saeng il! :3

it was my birthday an hour plus ago.

just thought i should leave a 'memory' in my immortal diary since maybe i would wanna know what happened today 10 yrs later.

had calls & some whatsapp messages from 12am, to which made me kinda smile as those people who called me were important people in my life <3 woeiyee, carlmann & ida lai :D

woeiyee called me at 12am despite the fact that she was halfway studying, & carlmann called me when she seldom calls me but she called me on MY BIRTHDAY :'3 & ida is all the way in Melbourne, &is a few hours ahead, & she called me! :D

had some relatives over so we chatted till wee hrs and yeahh, that's how i concluded my early morning - with a sleep.

woke up to my boyfriend by my side & his warmth <3 then we left for lunch in Nando's, Pavilion with my mum & my abang, Shaz'ie :D i love bringing my mum to try NEW food so i will normally bring her to places my dad wouldn't want to bring her to.

went there for lunch & some shopping & then that's about it.

then, hehe, it's time to collect my cake from Baskin Robins in Sunway. oh the journey T_T freaking sad. i don't like car rides if you know me personally. but yeah, it's 'kay, i went there. & ciao'ed right after i collected the cake :D

(i know, you're expecting for some pictures right? :D ahh, i will try to add them on soon, but if you think it's a little too dry & prefer pictures instead, follow me on instagram :))

man, it was a freezing experience in my car from Sunway to my house. 'cause it's an ice cream cake, & Kevin & I didn't want it to melt so fast so we blast the air cond to the minimum and we froze ._." for the sake of the cake. #thingsmyboyfrienddo & he is in fact more afraid of being cold.

& the cake is definitely not cheap ._. like what, RM150+ for 9inch? it's very big, & even 12 people eating can't finish it ._. so in the end we left the cake out & ate the ice cream ._. once it's thawed, you can't refreeze it back.

anyway to anyone of you who wants a Baskin Robins ice cream cake for your birthday, do keep in mind that they need at least 3 days to 'custom make' your own cake design. since my boyfriend didn't want to order earlier, we ended up taking what's left in the freezer instead :( so, yeah. i wanted a rainbow design instead of pre-made but.. it was too late :( i was feeling so upset that i had to take a design i didn't really like because i really wanted strawberry ice cream + vanilla cake.

i made him upset as well because he is already spending a lot on my mini cake & i am feeling upset. but he told me to be grateful as even he himself doesn't even get an ice cream cake but i am getting it now, #thingsmyboyfrienddo . i am happy to have him as my boyfriend because he tells me things straight to my face that is not right. & i am not ashamed to state my flaws here because this is how i am. i can be quite demanding & greedy. i admit that.

i don't know it's me or what, i really think that i am blessed with an awesome daddy & boyfriend. they both spoil me to the max. :) it is bad, but i feel rather grateful deep inside, seriously. i may not show it, but i really love them both <3

anyway back to my day :D

as i was saying that i was feeling upset i couldn't get my cake design customized to whatever design i wanted, i just kept quiet and stick to the ugly design i Kevin booked & paid. then today, when i went to the freezer to look at other cakes, i found a NICER ONE!! i quickly told Kevin i like the other one instead & asked if i could change #greedy . he said okay & he immediately asked the guy if we could change the cake. YAY, the guy said yes so Kevin told him that we'll take this 'NICER' cake! :3

he paid the balance & there we go, we quickly rushed home because there's a karaoke dinner with my uncle, aunty, & my cousins <3 (i wished it was my whole family but well, work commitments.)

so yeah, after doing the whatnot, we went to Neway Puchong to meet up with them :D

we had dinner, we sang, we danced. from the latest hitz to the classics. we enjoyed so much. i never had this kind of entertainment with my family before. 'cause normally when we go to karaoke, my dad will usually hug the microphone & no latest hitz will be played ._.

so yes i am really grateful for today :)

i had so many wonderful people with me today, & nothing else matters.

thank you so much!

thank you so much to those who wished me via facebook wall posts, messages, whatsapp, texts, & calls <3

(I DIDN'T STUDY TODAY TOO WTF)

on a very very very sad note, my Drug & Disease 1 class test is on Tuesday ._. & Biopharmacy 3 class test is on Friday. yes, 2 class tests in the same week. & to make things worst, I haven't started anything on Biopharmacy 3. can my life be any worst ._.

le sigh.

#lifeofastudent

I'm a makeup lover.

but that doesn't mean i use a lot of make up everyday :3

i love buying them, keeping them & i try to use them but most of the time i fail. why? because i am lazy.

i love Majolica Majorca, Kiss Me, Clio, Dolly Wink, CandyDoll. most of them are drug store brands. i don't know why i don't fancy make up by Dior, Chanel, etc. oh except for Benefit lah. their concealer is (Y) they  have this concealaholic on sale where it's super good seriously (but it's a little pricey, RM100+). it's perfect to conceal acne, dark eye, etc. they have this whole 'range' in the mini box. & it's not travel friendly.

anyway, not gonna share about concealaholic today but..

Victoria's Secret Ultimate Makeup Kit!

got this in Resort World Sentosa :3 my mum got it for me, actually. i got this a while back ago but too lazy to share so yeah here i am :D

it is around SGD50+?

*ignore the post it note on the reflection*

the overview of the whole set :D 

from eyeshadow, to blusher, to bronzer, to brushes are all in this kit. (oh oh oh, speaking of travel friendly :D)

clearer view of the blusher & other bronzer shades :)

i think one of the blusher shade is good for gyaru makeup eh?

brushes, lip liner, eyeshadows..

eyeshadow, lip colors..

look at how compact they are! you don't need to even carry other stuff in other "small" sizes. plus you know, being girls, we tend to bring our whole wardrobe to travel "just in case you might wanna wear it" but you know it well that you have enough clothings & it's unnecessary to bring others.

this will help you, 'cause they have most of the awesome colors & you will get to choose from the selection :D

the contents.

i hope i did make you drool :D

i really love make up, seriously. but i am too shy to wear them out.

i watch YouTube videos on how to put on make up with different looks. really love them but yeah, too lazy & too shy. why? no idea why as well.

ohh! my good friend even got me another set of eyeshadow set which i really wanted for a year plus but didnt get them.

if you like seeing posts about my makeup stuff, do let me know so i will share more :D

they're most of the time, in kits or sets. :)

anyway, thank you for staying with me for the whole 5 minutes.. or more! it meant a lot to me x

College.

suddenly i got the mood to write about my college experience. i mean, after so long?! i'm already in 2nd year of uni & suddenly college? what's wrong with me right?

to be honest, although I'm in where I am now, my heart never left where I graduated college from - Sunway. probably because of the environment.. or something.. many disliked that area but personally i like it. i guess i go where less of my friends are. most of my friends went to Taylor's. or MCKL.

(uh yes I went to MCKL but I left 'cause they didn't allow me to switch to AUSMAT in February. & so coincidentally my dad wanted me to do Australian matriculation after few months thinking A Levels will be the best for me)

coming to uni alone is not an easy task. many of my friends in uni had their own 'known' friends from college, etc but I had none. even if I had, we were from different groups & soon after a semester, my college mate left because of some personal reasons.

i still remember my first day in uni. i stepped in knowing no one. met some friends, was happy. but then again, shit happens. probably i am the reason to all that has happened but, i got no other choice right? i still have to graduate.

anyway, back to college.

stepping into MCKL was almost similar to stepping into WMS, except we were wearing our own clothes but no shorts, no slippers, no sleeveless, nothing revealing. oh not even a simple smocked spaghetti strap dress with cardigan over (friend's experience). even i got sent to the vice principal's office for wearing a 3 quarter denim.

time table was okay, there are breaks here and there but no classes end earlier than 3pm everyday except for Friday because it's some CF day. so yeah, it was quite of a living hell for me. (but i still made it through :3)

the reason why i went to MCKL was because i had 30% off tuition fees as i was moving on from WMS :) MCKL & WMS are affiliated, you see. for a whole A Levels course plus books & stuff, it doesn't exceed RM15k :) plus they have good student academic records :)

halfway through sem1 (3 sems altogether for A Levels), SPM results were released & within a day or 2, we had education fair in KLCC & Mid Valley. went to work to experience work :D earned some cash :D

dad came by, & suddenly he went to inquire for me. initially i did propose MUFY because its the closest to Sydney Uni Foundation Program in AUS. I wanted to go to Australia what. I've no idea what made my dad changed his mind but to actually send me to Sunway to study AUSMAT o_o I still wonder now, some times.

we did consider polytechnics in Singapore for some pharmaceutical diploma, in hope that I will get to appeal to do lesser years in degree.  but oh well, Singapore Polytechnic & Ngee Ann Polytechnic decided to hurt my feelings by telling me that there is no way i can do what i planned for so.. here I am, still in Malaysia. we even went to the polytechnics in SINGAPORE for all that inquiries.

just a day after SPM results, my dad straightaway shoot me "you wanna do A Levels or AUSMAT?" when i just stepped into my house not even off my shoes yet. i took the whole day to think because I wanna do AUSMAT, but I don't wanna leave someone in A Levels.. it was a freaking dilemma.

then my dad said he'll decide for me - AUSMAT. don't wanna waste time. or so he says..

sure, i left with a heavy heart. i went to bid my goodbyes the next day, to apply for my refundable deposit, & say my thanks to Mr Reuben. Mr Reuben didn't give me a very confident feeling that I will do well in AUSMAT because March intake is very "hectic" & I won't have time to rush them off. so I left MCKL, with mixed feelings.

no more living hell, no more LONG jeans & sandals, WHAT DO YOU THINK?!?

so yeah, the day after was the orientation, (i can say that i registered the day before the orientation) went to Sunway looking like a village girl - long jeans, etc. trained by MCKL. (somehow i think its a good training cause it trains you to be "professional")

what made me happier was the time table is so awesome that I can "select" my own slots & every class will have different people :D i like that kind of life :3

since I wasn't good at Physics, I didn't do Physics. was about to do pure science & go ahead and die but i have no idea what stopped me at that moment. maybe i should have done Physics instead of Biology instead ._. not like i am good at Biology anyway.

time passed really fast that year, day after day, week after week, sem after sem. i left MCKL with big hopes that i don't wanna get my heart broken in Sunway, but oh well, shit happens again.

always skipping CAE, always sleeping in CAE classes..

i love CAE because i don't need to really study so much for that :D except sometimes it's another half-living hell because you need to know the latest news in some companies & stuff like that. it was a "business" subject. hell boy, little did I know I love studying business. but not accounting wtf.

although i skip & sleep in CAE classes, my results for CAE paper will never go lower than 70% :D unlike other subjects, if I don't read or do something about it, it'll go below 50%. except for Biology. even if I stay awake 24/7 to study Biology, I can never make it through 60% ._. 1st sem was even shittier, 46% I think..

other subjects were 70% & 80%, but for Biology.. the only subject out of 5, I got 40+% ._.

the script looked ugly of course.

so i made a new goal for myself - to score more than 50% ._. I made it through that, I got quite above average for Biology for sem2. guess my hard work paid off (making my own notes, study JUST biology). i think my results were all above average that year, except Biology. (anyway, for ATAR they only take top 4 subjects for AUSMAT, so i kinda decided that i will flunk my Biology ._.)

made new friends in college, made good friends in college.. a bond that cannot be forgotten - Woei Yee, Jo'Anne & Michelle.

oh yes we had our ups & downs but we went through them all. honestly i miss them. i have no idea why i take this bond so seriously when maybe they don't give a crap about it. (well, I am still learning, alright?)

since i had no sisters (except for my cousin) & my brother was away, i was all alone at home, until Woei Yee became my sister :) yes we're not related anyhow but i felt like, i was loved & all. it's another sisterly bond i can never have with anyone. it's something that cannot be bought at any price.

there's once we argued 'cause i didn't want to cook soup for her. oh dear, look at that!? what kind of stupid reason, right? but it's what made us closer, & how she always piss me off, it became a norm.

we were in different classes for 2 subjects - Chemistry, & another elective. she did Psychology while I did CAE. so from Chem 8, I moved to Chem 7, where the 3 of them are there. i went for classes in the morning sometimes for Chem 8, and I crashed Chem 7 anyhow :)

my teachers were all awesome teachers. they weren't only like "you keep quiet now, dont talk when i'm teaching" but they were all interactive. ready to help anytime. i liked that kind of teachers. except for Miss Diana was a little scary o_o but it's where I get to improve my Chemistry :)

many disliked the teachers i liked, because they are all funny & they talk nonsense or they really teach. to me, they are educating me, but to them, they are boring. since I had a "mini failure" from my SPM results, i started having "hardworking" disease ever since.

i didn't get ATAR 90+ like i planned for, i have only myself to blame. i got myself hurt for some reason and was distracted. i got ATAR 90+ for mocks but WACE gave me 10% discount ._. so I got 80+. which is why, i am not in Australia :( or Singapore.

IMU was my last choice since i didn't want to pursue my degree here but that's where my results can only lead me to. so yeah </3 they say IMU has the highest qualification but i don't think so..personally. it's because i got rejected by many universities to know enough that IMU is not that tough to enter. but it's definitely tough to make it through the years in IMU.

it's easy to get in, but it's tough to finish the degree.

the environment in IMU is so different that it always make me miss Sunway so much. my batch has too little people compared to other batches. everything seems so limited in IMU.. but then again, i cannot compare because of the location differences. thank god there are places to eat nearby IMU - Sri Petaling. they have Chatime, Ochado, Padi House, PappaRich, etc! :3

& IMU is also 15 mins away from Sunway :) i missed Sunway so much i actually went to Sunway almost daily the first few weeks. then it slowly died to a few times a week, then fortnightly, then never ._.

it took a year for me to overcome this deep feelings inside me. i felt like crap, i cried several times but of course, i told none of the 3. don't even think that any of them will know. to them, life has moved on, & friends known in the past are meant to be forgotten. i know i should move on as well. but as much as i want to, i do cherish good friends i made in the past & want to keep them.

the truth hurts, i know i have to let go everything i had in my memory - Sunway, college, & friends. yes it sure gave me a very good experience studying there but I know i have to let them all go sooner or later.

the reason why i am typing this out is to keep a 'memoir' on my college experience for myself.

i know everyone goes through this, and it's only how well they take it :) i guess this is life. constantly moving on from the past.

anyhow, Sunway College will always be planted in my heart.

after all, i am a Sunway alumni :)

June

so.. it's June now?

can time pass any faster?!

when time passes fast, it means exams are nearing and can i highlight that i am not ready!? oh gosh. oh dear.

now i am panicking as usual and i don't know what else to do besides panicking. it's too scary and my heart is that weak to accept the fact that exams are nearing.

i'm only at page 17 when there's another 43+ pages to tackle. or more.

& it's the time where all assignments are to be handed in, and class tests coming one after another...not forgetting finals in July.

i should start counting down till the finals now..

i don't think there's a brighter side in this month. i suddenly feel unwanted wtf. so i guess i don't think there's any surprises this year, or any celebrations so.. i shall let it be because i won't be feeling any happier as exams and etc are around the corner. let alone next year's 21st birthday. before i could celebrate my birthday, i'll be leaving, if all goes well.

why is my life this risky?!